Come again, choose to go

Friday night I was in Olympia. And I felt like I was.. I want to say "19 again!" but then I realized that I was 19, and that my whole life is completely skewed. I have to drive 2 hours to find friends, or they 2 hours to find me.

I sang and danced under the sky. We made an entire bus do a sing along. We all laughed and stacked our feet on top of one another. There was a boy who had taken a month long oath to not talk; he stacked his feet, but did not laugh. And we shared a cigarette and he shared his music with me, and I leaned on him, and felt content, looking wildly all around.

And we staggered up the hill, peering into the storefronts. My nose stuffed full of pills, I was wide eyed and smiling. Feeling part of something. As we got closer to our destination music started playing, but nothing I have ever heard before.
We arrived and someone came running at me giving me a hug and screaming my name. Greg. And he dragged me all around, telling me to go up to people and ask them for drinks. And laughing at me, at my shyness. He has no such thing. But I get along with him none the less. We stole to the upstairs and smoked joints and looked out the window to a dark alley way and parking lot, and talked about the scenic view. Things on the wall kept falling off, whenever someone got locked in the bathroom and had to break down the door.

I saw a book by Allen Ginsberg and smiled, flipping through it then put it back.
When we went down for a cigarette, there were bodies on the porch covered in blankets. Greg whispered, "Whenever people throw big parties homeless kids come and ask if they can spend the night. It's nice"
They looked like dead bodies that had been covered to me, but I decided not to let it bother me. Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow.
And we made our way back. All the while skipping and jumping.
On the bus I got silent. Greg had found me my 1 buck whiskey chuck I had been asking for all night, and then laughed as I sat and smiled.


And at 10 in the morning I left Olympia, after going to the bus station to retrieve my cell phone which I had lost in all the commotion of the previous night.

On the way home the radio played all the right songs and I smiled the entire time.