Run run run

Feeling like running in your bones..
I tried to explain this concept to Keith last night. How I needed to get moving.
How I could feel it in my bones. That this was the right thing to do.
It was like that night, all those years ago. What? Three years almost?

Sally and I both got out of control. She ran as far away as she could, and I got lost in a house. And she had to be picked up by someone, and I almost got sexually attacked.

And after wards, when we found one another I said, "Can we drive to Stillwater?"
and we hugged one another, cried, and drove, though quite intoxicated, all the way to the river, and slept in the old red van.

And though this situation is much different, it feels like that need to leave and go to the river. Get away, and be changed forever.

That next morning, we walked, bare footed, along the river. At one point we realized I had my pants on inside out. We thought it was really funny, until we realized why they were inside out, and we both got quiet. We found some rocks to sit on and sat in silence looking at the water, looked at what was becoming of our lives.
As we drove back to Shoreview we were listening to "Homeward Bound" and I kept pressing the button to repeat the song. And we sang it over and over and over. We must have listened to it 10 times on that 20 minute drive.
She was leaving, and I would be staying. I was so mad that she was getting out of Minnesota. That she would soon be free.
We talked about running away. We talked about it throughout the rest of the summer. At one point I think we were both ready.

I think I'm ready to run.
It's funny, that I constantly think of my flights and frustrations as running. I never run physically run.
I always have this mystical place in mind as well. Whether it be the west, a cornfield, a river, San Francisco, New Mexico.

I've been listening to that song lately.. or rather the song has been finding me, San Francisco, I think it's a sign I need to get going.
This weekend I heard it at least 4 times. I haven't heard that song since my senior year of high school, really.
It's time.
I broke up with Keith last night.